We Asked AI to do a Comedy Roast for the Town of Estes Park

Ask anyone around Colorado about Estes Park, and everyone will tell you that the tiny mountain town is one of the best in the state.  It is a charming town filled with things to do and often a starting point of an adventure into Rocky Mountain National Park.

Thousands upon thousands of people flock to Estes Park every year to catch a glimpse of the Stanley Hotel, the hundreds of elk that overtake the town during the rut, and the breathtaking views of the mountains. It surely is a special place for many.

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The Roast of Estes Park, Colorado Performed by Artificial Intelligence

We've had artificial intelligence numerous towns throughout the Northern Colorado area, today, ChatGPT visits the town of Estes Park, Colorado.

Ah, Estes Park, Colorado—the place where nature lovers and overpriced taffy collide! Estes is like the theme park version of a mountain town, complete with enough tourists to make you question if the Rocky Mountains have their own gravitational pull. You want to see wildlife? Well, you’re in luck, because there’s nothing wilder than dodging a family of five with matching “I survived the hike” t-shirts, even though the only thing they survived was the parking lot at the Stanley Hotel.

You cannot do a roast of Estes Park without mentioning the Stanley Hotel.

Speaking of the Stanley Hotel, Estes Park is basically “The Shining” with more Instagram filters. Everyone’s here to get spooked, but the scariest thing is probably the price of a cup of coffee at any café within a mile of that place. “Oh, you felt a cold draft in the hallway? That’s just the spirit of overpriced real estate wafting through.” The only real horror story is finding a parking spot during peak tourist season. If you thought the hotel was haunted, just wait until you see the face of someone trying to parallel park a rental SUV on a Saturday.

Nothing is safe when it comes to a comedic roast, not even the shops on the main drag.

Then there's the shopping. Estes Park has more fudge and souvenir shops per capita than anywhere else on Earth. You can’t walk ten feet without someone trying to sell you a T-shirt with a moose on it, a jar of jam made from some random local berry, or a dreamcatcher that looks like it was made by a committee of Etsy amateurs. It’s like the town was built around a central theme of "how much kitsch can we possibly shove into one street?" And don't forget the saltwater taffy stores—because nothing says "mountain retreat" like jaw-breaking candy you could’ve gotten at a boardwalk in New Jersey.

Finally, ChatGPT takes aim at the tourists and outdoorsy folks who visit Estes Park.

RELATED: AI ROASTS THE CITY OF FORT COLLINS

 

And of course, Estes is known for its hiking—perfect for people who want to pretend they’re outdoorsy while wearing $300 hiking boots that have only seen the inside of a REI. The trails are beautiful, sure, but good luck finding a moment of peace when you're being passed by people who think taking selfies every five minutes counts as cardio. It’s less “escape into nature” and more “try to avoid photobombing a dozen influencers with GoPros strapped to their heads.” Estes Park: where the scenery is breathtaking, but the crowds will have you gasping for air first.

It seems as if the only thing that avoided the roast of Estes Park is the elk. Maybe artificial intelligence knows that getting too close to an elk is very, very dangerous.